Fiercely Dependent

Posted on September 20th, 2007 by Cam.
Categories: Let's talk.

I hear a few people every now and then describe themselves as independent. This may refer to their character, their finances, their decision making skills, their ability to cope with life’s problems, their determination to get through things on their own, etc. or whatever other aspects make up an independent individual. I have a great deal of admiration for those people that can say they have got through on their own, battled through adversity without having to depend or rely on others and come out the other side successfully. I, on the other hand, am fiercely dependant.
I am not saying this as an admission that has taken me a while to verbalise, I’ve known for years. I bask in the fact. I have no hesitation in stating with absolute certainty that I could not have made it to this point without people generously pouring themselves into my life. As much as I am able to admire other peoples’ independence, I don’t really want to venture down that path. I have experienced so much in the way of people giving of themselves to make my life better, easier, funner (it will be a word one day), richer, cheaper and deeper. Why the heck would I want to go independent?
There is an insight you get into one’s character when you allow them to do stuff for you, when you declare you need someone’s help, when you give them permission to be generous. I have been learning a lot about how ready people are to look after people given the opportunity. These are golden moments where a healthy humility meets a willing outpouring, where a person says let me help you, or when we get to the point where we ask someone to step in and help.
Not a day is going by at the moment when I am not mindful and thankful for the people in my life that show me that my dependence on them is significant.

img_0250.jpg

Libs and I at Araluen before radiotherapy started. This is the ‘before’ shot. I haven’t got an ‘after’ shot just yet, so just imagine my chest is a bit red and I am a little more ‘swollen’ or ‘puffy’. I have been feeling pretty weak this last week. My hip has been giving me a bit of pain for about 10 days now and it hasn’t been getting better really so I was able to have Xrays done yesterday to find out what is going on there. Apart from that, I am really struggling in my concentration. I am finding that the fatigue that they hinted about before radiotherapy might actually be true. I am almost completely off steroids now so I am not sure what to expect over the next few weeks considering I went from feeling like a 94 year old man to Superman within 12 hours of starting them. My legs, however, stayed looking like the 94 year old man’s throughout the course of treatment.

3 comments.

rowes x 3

Comment on September 20th, 2007.

Cam love the shot, love the 94 year old legs and love your blurb about dependence, thing or two there to learn this end about that I think… mmm… still lovin you guys and praying goodness and mercy over you both

Toddy

Comment on October 8th, 2007.

a 94yo to be sure, but a fit-looking 94yo!
If you’re comparing yourself to an old-timer, you need to start using expressions like ‘gyp’. As in, ‘my hip is giving me gyp’. What’s cool about this is that it rhymes, and could even be used in another 30yrs in ‘retro-rap’ (another word that will become official one day)

Brodie Teoh

Comment on October 9th, 2007.

hey Cam Your a champ man!! an Inspiration to myself bro!! God Bless ya bro!! hope all goes well!! thanx for all u’ve done in my life man!! ur a champ!!

Leave a comment

Comments can contain some xhtml. Names and emails are required (emails aren't displayed), url's are optional.