Unremarkable, my butt!

Posted on October 16th, 2007 by Cam.
Categories: Let's talk.

I think I have turned a corner. The day we received the report claiming my pelvis was unremarkable (no evidence of cancer), was the same day I was instructed to come off the crutches and walking frame. So I have been off them since Thursday.
This means I am now walking unassisted, finished radiotherapy, I don’t have cancer in my pelvis, I am pretty much over my chest infection and I am feeling relatively good. The biggest pain I have has been dealing with a sore rib that occurred during a coughing fit with the chest infection, but even that has been feeling better in the last day or so.

The good news for us is slowly sinking in. It seems to take a few days for us to adjust from a negative prognosis to hearing good news. It is tainted I suppose by the fact we have been through this a couple of times before, and there is great difficulty in knowing if the cancer is indeed contained locally in my sternum. For now, it has been enough to get us thinking about being able to take a break when I am physically able.

What is amazing is how I have been given this diagnosis in the light of what seemed to be a certainty. All the doctors were gearing me up for chemotherapy because the cancer seemed to be present in my pelvis. Everyone was pretty sure of this. I was put on a special diet while in hospital to fatten me up for chemo, we were sent to the fertility clinic to prepare for infertility due to my nurries being fried through chemo, I was even measured up based on where the cancer was in my pelvis to have it radiated before chemo- I have the tattoo to prove it! Elizabeth and I spent 45 minutes looking at the X-rays, bone scans and CT scans with the Oncologist looking at the images that indicated cancer in the pelvis. Everything was pointing toward Multiple Myeloma due to my pelvis. Now, it ain’t there.

What I can say is this: For those of you that are pretty keen on putting all this down to coincidence, then add it to the ever-growing list. For those that have been praying, I am very thankful to you all. I have never doubted the reality of prayer. It is the way that God answers or chooses to respond that sometimes leaves me wondering. While I am sitting here, contemplating going on holidays, someone else is waiting for a life-saving kidney, or is not winning the battle with cancer, or is grieving the loss of a child. This does not take away from my gratefulness to God, but it certainly makes me wonder what he is up to.

A mentor friend of mine was over the other day and we were chatting about this. He has decided that he is not going spend any more time trying to justify God’s actions. We have both grown up hearing people whipping out comments like ‘It is part of God’s greater plan’, or ‘Things will work out in the end for the greater good’, or how about ‘We may not understand why God has allowed this to happen, but we will see that it will work out for the best’. I believe this has the potential to be quite offensive to people that have lost loved ones tragically, or are going through sickness, or are going through some major difficulties where it seems God has left the building. When my friend is expected to explain why God has done this or that, or allowed suffering in situations, his response may be as simple and as honest as, ‘I don’t know’. No justification, no explanation, no clichés. How refreshing.

There are many stories of God healing miraculously, and rightly so – God does it often. There are many times though when tragic things happen and God didn’t come to the rescue as we wanted him to. We don’t often hear these examples given when people try to convey the character of God. Sometimes, if this subject comes up, the natural reaction is to try to justify why God may have responded in a way that didn’t bring us joy. I believe that we may be missing out on understanding a significant aspect of God’s nature when we decide to not process the tragic events that happen in our lives in favour of thinking up excuses for God’s apparent absence.

I know, however, that God never leaves the building. When we try to justify God’s actions or inaction, I think we are in dreadful danger of denying a greater understanding of God’s character. The more we apply our human thinking to explaining the reasons why God did this or didn’t do that, the closer we are to turning a sovereign Creator into the bloke next door.

20 comments.

Karyn

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

If, as a nurse, I wanted to know the intricate details of some rocket science issue, without having studied anything in it’s field, I would feel pretty arogant to expect the rocket builder to answer my question to any great extent. That idea helps me when I just don’t get God, I imagine myself asking Him a question and hearing a grandfatherly response of “sweatie, I’d love to explain, but your brain’s just too little to understand” No condesension, just the obvious fact that having not created the universe, my ability to grasp some (most) stuff is seriously limited. Stoked to hear about your latest miracle. The offer to help out, in whatever you find yourself needing, is still open. God bless heaps

Chris

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

Cam, I have been following your progress eagerly hoping for good news. We don’t know each other but your story has touched me. Your last comments about not understanding why God does or doesn’t intervene is also pertinent in my life. My husband died suddenly at 42 leaving me to cope with three children aged 1, 3 and 7. I lost the love of my life and was thrown into a living hell. I wondered how God could let this happen and why he wouldn’t step in and sort out this mess. My children were mentally scarred and I was only one person to hold everything together as well as keep us afloat financially. I couldn’t have got to a lower place but suicide wasn’t an option because I couldn’t leave my children orphans. Sometimes is just seems that the burden is just too much for one person. Somehow I kept my faith throughout this ordeal although sometimes I felt quite dead to God. One of the turning points for me was when I stopped looking for answers and accepted that I would never find them in this life. How could I ever expect to understand God with my human mind. My best decision I made was to ask God to give me the faith I needed because I wasn’t sure I was strong enough. Even though there were many times I felt abandoned by God and even felt he’d shut the door on me, when I look back I can see his hand in every step of the way to my family’s recovery. My faith is stronger than ever. I have no doubts now about the reality of God in our lives. He is there supporting us and loving us all the time it is just sometimes we can’t see it and we don’t understand the way he works. I think that when we get to Heaven we may well have that understanding of God that eludes us here. You have my best wishes and prayers.

Ruth

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

Wow Cam, this great news leaves me speechless for a moment.
Our love and continuing prayers for you and Elizabeth, and all the Harris extensions!
Ruth

manda and iain

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

wow Cam don’t know what to say, just singing the hallelujah chorus!!! your thoughts leave me to ponder mmmmmm

Andrew Hamilton

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

Hey – good news mate

I share your disdain for those who offer the platitudes. Sometimes life is hard – very hard – but you’re right – God never leaves the building

liznlach

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

Good stuff. Love from L&L

Kaleb Smith

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

For those who are so inclined to tedium. Scriptures about David calling to God, and God answering. This list is a one sided list, in that God did not always answer David at the moment of his distress. However I believe this list is justified because still, David never failed to call, and looking over his whole life I must say:
Praise God for his unending faithfulness to those that call upon his name!
Psalm 3:4, Psalm 4:1, Psalm 17:6, Psalm 20:1, Psalm 20:6, , Psalm 20:9, Psalm 27:7, Psalm 34:4, Psalm 38:15,
Psalm 65:5, Psalm 69:13, Psalm 81:7, Psalm 86:7, Psalm 91:15, Psalm 99:6, Psalm 118:21, Psalm 120:1, Psalm 138:3

Cam what awesome news! … Praise God!

Stace Warrington

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

Heya Cam… great news:) its strange how someone can learn so much from someone elses journey. Struggling myself with trying to understand God and have people say well… its all a part of God’s plan, at times makes me wanna say well darnit you wanna show me wat that plan is!?! but through wat i just read… What God’s been saying to me has been instilled in me… the fact is we don’t know… but its not about knowing… its about trusting anyway. its the Faith in Gods Words that we just don’t get… that will pull us through. You sound like you’re doing aite Cam:) Keep your chins up guys and … Just keep swimming!:)
In His Love
Stace xox

aunty Lynne

Comment on October 16th, 2007.

Hi cameron,
Even though we are in Europe and having a most wonderful holiday, you are never far from our thoughts.
love you
Uncle Cavan and Aunty Lynne

deb Wilson

Comment on October 17th, 2007.

All we can say is ‘PRAISE GOD’ …….love to you and Elizabeth from the Wilsons at Hovea.

The Hoppers

Comment on October 17th, 2007.

Hi Cam and Elizabeth,
I am stunned to read this latest update!! And also so happy to hear the great news!! Lots of Love to you both as always you are in our thoughts every day xxxx
Sally, Steve, Tobin and Brodie

Steve Mac

Comment on October 18th, 2007.

Hi mate

Really appreciated this post – the honesty, integrity and gut-busting faith.

Steve, Jill, and Sophie

Rachel dR

Comment on October 18th, 2007.

Wow Cam and Libs,
I also am just so super happy! Ok, it does have to do with the fact that i’m enjoying tropical heat and fruit right now, but the biggest smile I have is always the one from seeing prayer answered – fantastic!

paul Morrison

Comment on October 18th, 2007.

dude – stoked to hear latest news. I love the light you shine! bulk love – morro

Rory Shiner

Comment on October 20th, 2007.

Rock on Cam. Great post (both in the news it conveys and the understanding of God it explains). We’ve love to have you guys over (or have ourselves at yours) some time over Christmas. One idea is Christmas Eve dinner at ours. Talk to you about it soon.
We are praying…

The Coopers at Chids

Comment on October 20th, 2007.

OUR GOD IS AN AWESOME GOD!!
Love & hugs to you both from all of us.

leonie meerwald

Comment on October 24th, 2007.

Hey Cammy,
Don’t really know what to say. You know what? Sometimes I think life is shit. Sorry but I do. I don’t understand. I miss how we could hang out. All of us could hang out. We never thought of this. My background is different, I’m not being disrespectful. I wish it was the old days sometimes, you know…lonley street etc

Susanna Hopkins

Comment on October 26th, 2007.

Awesome! My, you write so well!
Yes, I agree with all you say above…except, I’d add for myself, that, although He is not “the bloke next door” for sure, He still is closer than the bloke next door…… I believe.
Not something that we can “understand” with our minds, I believe, but something that we can experience. As you say: “God never leaves the building”… YES! He is always there, close and always everywhere! He may not be “felt”, cannot be touched as such, cannot be boxed in or understood, yet, in my belief, I KNOW, (in my spirit, I guess)……. that “ He never leaves us nor forsakes us”
Call me naïve, simple, …… but …. at this stage, that’s ALL I “know”, that’s what I am hanging on to, that’s why I can keep trusting, hoping, praying, talking to Him…… He is here, He is real, HE knows, HE understands, He is in control……..

We are so happy and thank God for your healing! And ask Him to complete it and restore you totally!
We love you guys heaps and hope to see you sometime soon! Big hugs, all the Hoppies :o )

Julie

Comment on November 3rd, 2007.

Amen….

Bad Grammar Man

Comment on November 5th, 2007.

“sweatie, I’d love to explain, but your brain’s just too little to understand”

New insights on God: He calls us Sweatie?
Is this all the time or only after we’ve been running around?

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