Reframe

Posted on May 23rd, 2008 by Cam.
Categories: Let's talk.

We were back with Specialist Brad today, albeit very briefly. There was a mistake made with the booking times and so he squeezed us in during his lunch break. It just made the session very short, but we got all our questions answered, so we’re happy.

My bloods are good and showing my kidneys are functioning well (they were struggling quite a bit while I was being treated in hospital due to the anti-fungals). My liver function is still not 100%, but it is getting better. For those who like to keep track of how my para-proteins (kappa) are going, they are hovering around 24. We were kind of hoping they would be closer to 0, but not this time.

A comment that hit me a little hard today was in response to us asking Brad about the implications if we wanted to travel next year. He said, “Of course, you have to live! Cam’s future is uncertain, you have to keep on making plans and live!”

‘Cam’s future is uncertain’. That is what is easy to forget, or what I want to forget. I know that this outlook really applies to everyone, but to hear it coming from a person who has an educated understanding of how uncertain my future is was unnerving. I am still analysing how I have responded to hearing that.

While writing this post just now, a good friend just called and told me of her friend of a friend who has MM for 12 years and is still going strong. I really love hearing about these cases, ones that are specific and encouraging. So the things I have heard today kind of balance each other out.

All this still makes me wonder how I want to spend the next chapter of my life. I feel like I am back in year 12 and struggling to know what to do with the rest of my life. We’ll see.

7 comments.

sojourner

Comment on May 24th, 2008.

Do whatever your heart desires and know God will be pleased!

karyn anne

Comment on May 24th, 2008.

Hey Cam, you don’t know me but I met your sisters at various Christian camps and church events… way back when…! Anyway, I’ve been following your blog and am profoundly impacted on a regular basis. I’m an RN and about to change track from ED nursing to cancer care in an outpatient clinic in Brisbane. I’d really appreciate hearing any stories -the good and the bad- about nursing staff, any tips you can offer to make me a more sensitive practitioner would also be greatly appreciated. Enjoy your travels and the planning for them, I truly believe the anticipation can be almost as much fun. God bless heaps

cons

Comment on May 24th, 2008.

Travel! Travel lots, eat good food, drink good wine, see amazing things. Far greater to live like your life is uncertian than to live like you have a hundred years up your sleeve. And like you said, you know of someone who is 12 years and going strong, and 12 years ago there wouldn’t have been the same information and research that there is now, so maybe one day you will be someones friend who is 20 years and still going strong..know what i mean? A couple of years ago i met a man who was diagnosed with MND and he was told he would have 6 months max. But he is still around now, and its been something like 12 years. He would quite often say that if he could go back in time he would go back to when he first received his diagnosis and tell himself ‘Listen, don’t worry, you still have a huge life ahead of you so don’t think about the end because its not coming anytime soon’. xxxxxxx not sure what I am trying to say really, i guess to live like tomorrow is your last day but to know that it really isn’t.

Toddy

Comment on May 24th, 2008.

Karyn Anne – can I make some suggestions?

Lots of info, a hand that is steady, a sound knowledge of where it is you’re supposed to stick the $$&%@* big needle, and take it easy on the perfume.

This is just my perspective of a dad who had a kid in hospital for a week 9yrs ago.

Now – for some serious advice that will involve words that start with silent letters, over to Cam!

Oh Cam – a quick word for you…
“we all have an uncertain future.
You just have more people talking about yours.”
Todd Ellery

I chose to put it in quotation marks and stick my name on the end just in case someone doesn’t see through the dumbness of it, and considers it to be wise.

See – we all live in hope of the miraculous!!
:)

Guy in the white suit

Comment on May 25th, 2008.

When I read your doctor’s comment, I wasn’t quite sure how to take it either. It’s like a draw in a football match. He’s not saying you’ve lost the game (praise God), but he’s not saying you’ve got the four premiership points. So, to coin a football cliche, you need to play it one year at a time.

Unfortunately, your circumstances have nothing to do with football, so take anything written here with a truck load of salt.

Mind you, I’m tipping you to make the finals.

Toddy

Comment on May 25th, 2008.

C’mon Guy – you and I are pretty cut up about yesterday arvo’s result, so let’s not talk about purple.

BUT – I don’t believe you’ve even scratched the surface regarding the footy analogy, so I’m putting the challenge out there – go hard!

I recall sitting up to the wee-small with you making copious remarks based on farming to a young fella with a new plot, so I reckon you can draw more from this one.

Let me get you started… ‘itls all about the 1 percenters.’

Mim...

Comment on May 29th, 2008.

Cam I remeber you in year 12 changing your mind every week or so about what career you wanted to have… it seems that you have had a go at a few not on that list… But you well know that God had them on his list. Keep trusting in Jesus – He’s the WAY, TRUTH & LIFE – you are a living example of that. It’s good to read your thoughts – many of us race through life & dont evaluate what we’re here for – I so wish you didnt have to go through this at all, but appreciate the honesty of your reflections & hope you will contiue to bless many others as they journey with you – even if it is from a distance. To all of us… “Love life & live it to the full!” John 10:10
:)

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